This has been out for a month; but it was on Colbert a couple days ago, so let’s talk about some blurred lines here.
Specifically, Robin Thicke’s hit-song “Blurred Lines,” which is you haven’t heard, 1) here’s the video and 2) get out from under a rock.
That was the CLEAN version I treated you to, okay? There’s also a dirty version involving naked girls dancing. Disgusting.
But the video, bad as it is, is not my major problem with the song. That part is the words. Let’s look at them:
If you can’t hear what I’m trying to say
If you can’t read from the same page
Maybe I’m going deaf,
Maybe I’m going blind
Maybe I’m out of my mind
Okay. It looks fine, but the real trouble is here….
OK now he was close, tried to domesticate you
But you’re an animal, baby, it’s in your nature
There. I’m a civilized woman, NOT an animal. And I’m not a bigot or a destructive warlord, who are the real animals among us.
Just let me liberate you.
Is this really what we want to teach our children? That women need men to liberate them? Because that’s just wrong. And it’s what the song suggests.
You don’t need no papers
Hey, hey, hey
That man is not your maker
Hey, hey, hey
Don’t know what the first line is about; the third line seems to be about the other guy. Let’s just move on to this…
And that’s why I’m gon’ take a good girl
I know you want it
I know you want it
I know you want it
“I know you want it.” Well, for the gentlemen out there, let’s put this out there. Women don’t always “want it.” You shouldn’t be assuming that. I’ll tell you want the woman in the cubicle across from you wants. She wants that promotion. And she’s more qualified than the guy who’s gonna get it; but your boss didn’t think there was sexism silently rooted into his decision.
You’re a good girl.
This sounds an awful lot like he’s encouraging a five-year-old to wait for everyone to start eating dinner. “You’re a good girl. He’s almost here. That’s the girl.” “You’re a good girl, you should do it with me. Be good.”
Not cool.
Can’t let it get past me
You’re far from plastic
Talk about getting blasted The way you grab me
Must wanna get nasty
Go ahead, get at me
He’s determined, but at the same time, the encouragement is there, as is the feeling that he knows what she’s thinking, even though he doesn’t.
What do they make dreams for
When you got them jeans on
What do we need steam for
“What do they make dreams for when you got them jeans on?” He’s basically saying, “I’ve been taught that I have this right [he’s a man, remember]. I’ve dreamt about this my whole life so do as I say.” Arguably worse than “I know you want it.”
You the hottest bitch in this place
I don’t care if it’s a woman or a Faux anchor, don’t call anybody that.
I feel so lucky
You wanna hug me
What rhymes with hug me?
The only part of the song that paints a woman in any positive light whatsoever.
One thing I ask of you
Let me be the one you back that ass to
Go, from Malibu, to Paris, boo
Yeah, I had a bitch, but she ain’t bad as you
So if a woman doesn’t do what Robin Thicke wants she’s bad. Why are we still wondering why women are afraid to report rapists?
I’m skipping a big part; it’s just not worth writing about.
Baby can you breathe? I got this from Jamaica
It always works for me, Dakota to Decatur, uh huh
No more pretending
Cause now you winning
Here’s our beginning
When you sleep with Robin Thicke, you win. If not, you loose. Again, not what we should be teaching our children. We should be respecting the woman in the cubicle across from you; not saying “she’s loosing” for being independent.
Okay. You’re thinking the tune is irresistable. Well, at least in this parody, Wendy Davis is more than an “abortion barbie.”
And finally, compared with the first video, how does THIS ONE make you feel?
I know; I’m a feminist and I had bigger doubts about posting that last one than the first one.
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